Weekend Wrap-up.

Bike rides to the library where while waiting for B to check his emails I overheard someone in the bathroom with a nasty case of the diarrhea’s. It was loud. And wet.

Rode our bikes to the International Day Festival which turned out not to be that International. Lots of overweight, white people looking at neighborhood business bullshit like US Bank and Church of Karin. Ya. Church. of. Karin.  They did have Catfish-on-a-Stick and a Thai cart so, I guess I had my share of cultural diversity for the year.

Caprese salads and BBQ with naked little boys roaming around our yard. Say wha?

Taking Bonkers for long walks while getting whistles and honks from passerbys.

Not knowing when to keep my big fucking mouth shut so not to seriously offend blacks people. I kid. I kid. Get over it.  No one should EVER take me seriously. Do you hear me? EVER.

Petty theft and white lies.

Salem. Need I say more? Okay, I will. Went there. Drank beers, went swimming, went boating, learned how to do a flip in the pool, played Speed, gave some sunshine/pool head,  road a raft like a bull, ate some Mexican food in 100 degree heat and got stuck in traffic cursing that it better be a wreck slowing these fucks down to a 5mph crawl. It was. Made it home by dark. Exhausted and full.

Reading in the sun.

Watched a couple at a bar (who seemed really nervous) guzzle down some drinkies. A while later, a bald, chubby, lame tattooed, backwards hat guy came. They apparently  met on the Intranets (according to our trusty bartender). They proceeded with whiskey, jello shots, beers and vodka (til obviously the girl was drunk enough to think getting gang-banged by two douche-bags with icky ball soup while she herself had vagina stew) which sounded like a fun thing to do on a 85 degree Sunday night. 

I now have a mild case of sun damage and two-toned tits.